


Raw

by Rhanon_Brodie (Glass_Jacket)



Series: Kodachrome [6]
Category: Arctic Monkeys, British Singers RPF, Indie Music RPF
Genre: Jamie shaves his beard!, M/M, Outdoor Sex, Skinny Dipping, first I love you's, first time unprotected sex, remember lube kids, there's always time for lube
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-04
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-07-29 06:12:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7673116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glass_Jacket/pseuds/Rhanon_Brodie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>takes place after chapter 4 of 'Trespasses Sweet Urged' - you don't have to read it for continuity, but you might like it!</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> takes place after chapter 4 of 'Trespasses Sweet Urged' - you don't have to read it for continuity, but you might like it!

_**Sheffield, 2010** _

 

They’re in Sheffield now, a week after Liverpool to meet Jamie’s dad after Jamie had returned from his semester in Amsterdam, and for Jamie it’s strange to feel so at home in a place he’s never been before.

The bed is a bit small, and the sheets smell like a different laundry detergent. There’s no distant sound of traffic coming from the open window - instead it’s the soft, steady patter of light rain tapping along the leaves of the oak trees outside. The only thing that is constant is the warm, welcome weight of Alex where he lays on Jamie, his breath steadily puffing in and out across Jamie’s chest hair.

He likes it. He likes the Turners, Penny and David, and he likes their small, but bustling little household that backs onto the woods. Off the back porch (which Jamie discovered last night has quite the view of a sunset, which pairs well with David Turner’s good scotch that he loves to share) there’s a chicken coop with a dozen fancy hens that lay speckled eggs which Penny turned into the most decadent benedict the first morning they’d arrived. There’s also two birdbaths, and a hummingbird feeder, the latter of which doesn’t see much traffic, but gives the garden an extra touch of whimsical freedom that Jamie finds he’s actually quite fond of. The overgrown garden with its towering gladiolas in lavender, yellow, white, and crimson, the shaggy, ethereal weeping willow, the foxglove that grows wild along the fences, the impatiens, and the ivy, are all a far cry from Robert Cook’s landscaped hedges, professional fence lines, masoned patios, and the glistening pool. Alex mentioned a lake on the drive up, and a rickety dock that may or may not be still standing in the cool water; he also mentioned a path that led through the woods, and how he’d spent his formative years there with his mate Matthew, learning how to build fires and tie knots.

The little would-be-boyscout stirs in Jamie’s arms, drawing Jamie’s attention from where he’s staring out the window, going over his first twenty-four hours with the Turners. Now he’s focused on Alex’s face, relaxed, flawless, gorgeous...Jamie’s fingers curl and he draws the back of them down from Alex’s forehead to the corner of that mouth he can’t get enough of. Alex turns into the touch with a hum, and presses his other cheek into the broad plane of Jamie’s chest.

“Mornin’,” Alex murmurs gently.

Jamie whispers back, “Mornin’.”

“I knew you were awake because your heartbeat changed,” Alex points out, not opening his eyes. His fingers card into Jamie’s chest hair and he tugs playfully. “A bit different from wakin’ up at yer Da’s, eh?”

“Yeah,” Jamie murmurs, turning his hand so his fingers twist into the waves of Alex’s hair. That first morning at his father’s home they’d been up, showered, and dressed and downstairs before the rest of the house had really woken. 

“Kinda like...makes you wanna take your time, don’t it? Layin’ here.”

Jamie smiles at Alex’s sleepy drawl. “Why on earth would you ever want to leave this place?”

“Not much to do here after sixth unless you’re a steel worker or a school teacher.”

“Would you come back here to teach? Someday, down the road?”

Alex’s fingers pause where they flick over Jamie’s skin, pressing into the few freckles the blond has, and he finally cracks his eyes open, warm and rich mahogany staring deep into Jamie’s gaze. “Dunno,” Alex sighs, grinning. “Suppose that depends on what you’re doing someday. Down th’road.”

Jamie swallows at the admission, and he feels a little tremor run in his chest. “Eh...yeah,” he answers lamely.

Alex’s expression falls for a split second, barely noticeable, but then he’s propped up with a hand on either side of Jamie’s chest, angling his head down as he slots his hips against the man beneath him. “Kiss me,” he breathes, already pushing his lips to Jamie’s.

Jamie complies, and finds himself falling a little more into something that feels like forever.

+

Penny Turner makes outstanding coffee. Really, the diminutive woman with the platinum bob and the wire rimmed glasses is giving Magda a run for her money in the culinary department. Jamie sips from his second cup, fixed with heavy cream and maple syrup, and watches as Alex moves about in perfect synchronicity with his mother as they make quick work of the rasher of back bacon, more eggs, and blueberry muffins. Jamie’s in danger of sighing blissfully; the look on his face as he admires Alex’s dexterity with a spatula (almost as quick as he is with words) is not lost on David Turner, who idly reads the newspaper and carries on light conversation with anyone who will listen.

“Quite the chef, our Alexander, eh, Jamie?”

“Yes,” Jamie nods, sitting back and watching. “Though I’ve yet to see the full extent of his culinary skills.”

David laughs at the surprise curling around Jamie’s words. “He hasn’t cooked for you?” The elder Turner asks incredulously. 

Jamie pauses to think. “Um...pancakes in the morning,” he shrugs. “Eh...Al, sweetheart,” he starts, the endearment falling from his mouth before he can catch it. If anyone notices, they don’t comment on it, and Alex turns from the stove and tucks a curl behind his ear where it’s slipped from the bun at the back of his head. 

“Yes, love,” Alex replies pointedly, with a grin. “What would you like?”

“Have you cooked for me before?”

Alex pauses and stares up at the ceiling as he thinks. “Just pancakes, I think. Maybe soup?”

“Oh, Alex, really,” Penny scolds with a laugh. “Pancakes? Anyone can make pancakes, love, what about...oh, what’s that thing you make with the lemon and the chicken.”

“Picatta?” Alex supplies.

“Picatta!” Penny repeats excitedly. “ _That_ is a dish that is sure to win Jamie over.”

“I don’t know, Penny,” David chimes in. “I think Alex may have already succeeded in that.”

Jamie’s face turns pink beneath his beard and he busies himself behind his coffee.

“Da!” Alex groans, glancing towards Jamie, seeing the older man shift in discomfort. “Come on,” he mumbles pleadingly.

“Sorry, sorry,” David puts his hands up placatingly. 

Alex turns back to the stove as Jamie’s eyes find him once more. That little lurch in his heart makes itself known once more and he sets his coffee cup down and lets out a small breath.

“All right?” David asks softly.

“Yeah...yes, sir, thank you.”

David watches Jamie for a moment longer, a knowing smile crossing his lips, before he turns back to his paper and points out that the rain is to let up by noon, and that the forecast for the weekend is looking to be quite splendid. There’s some clamour of relief - the Turners’ family barbecue was that afternoon, and while the rain wouldn’t stop them, it would definitely put a bit of wrench into their plans.

Jamie tries to offer to do the dishes, but Penny and David shoo the boys away, telling them to go get cleaned up, or to relax, take a walk, whatever they feel like. It is, after all, the beginning of their summer, and they’ll only have until July to enjoy it - that’s when Alex’s summer sessions start as a teacher’s aide, and Jamie’s project on the new wing of the language building will be in the first stages of drafting. The two of them disappear upstairs with Penny’s voice following them,

“And showering together doesn’t ‘save water’, Alexander, so don’t even bother.”

Alex’s face turns rosy as Jamie snickers. “Fine then,” Alex huffs. “M’goin’ first.”

+

Holed up in his childhood room, Alex lounges on the bed and listens to the water crashing down in the shower across the hall. He thinks he hears the occasional note strangled by Jamie’s voice, and he has to smile - honestly, the man couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket with a lid on it, but that doesn’t deter Jamie. Really, that’s one of the best things about Jamie in general: he isn’t one to be deterred.

_Certainly spent a goodly amount of time chasin’ me down_ , Alex thinks with a grin. He idly flicks through the NME magazine he’d bought in the small grocery they’d stopped in on their way out of Liverpool and lets his mind drift over the first six months of his relationship with Jamie.

It’s been...well, not a whirlwind, but definitely fast-tracked. One moment he’s bored to tears and on the verge of leaving a rather stuffy school function, and the next moment he’s laying in his home in Sheffield, listening to Jamie butcher another tune by The Strokes - what was it this time? Alex sits up and cocks his ear, and manages to make out _Trying Your Luck_ and he feels a little swell of warmth go through him.

That song was what was playing that night when they’d first...With a sigh, Alex closes his eyes and lays back on the bed, his hand gently resting on his hip as he goes under the waves of his memory.

_“I’m...m’not...I mean, m’not a virgin, aye?” Jamie had chuckled nervously from where he hovered over Alex, his fingers shaking as he drew them up and down Alex’s bare thighs. “But I...don’t have...haven’t...done this. A lot. Like this. With...y’know. Guys.”_

_Alex had grinned up at Jamie’s jagged confession. For all the words he spouted with the lights on, buttoned up under denim and wool, when Jamie was naked and in the moment, he turned into an adorable, albeit slightly insecure, young man who tripped on his words and let his emotions rule him. The fact that Jamie was nervous was incredibly sexy to Alex, and he reached for Jamie, sliding one hand over Jamie’s hip, the other around the back of his neck, pulling him down until their naked bodies were touching. “Shut up, Jameh,” Alex breathed. “I’ll take care o’ya.”_

_By the end, of course, Alex wasn’t sure whom was taking care of whom, as they were both shivering, clinging to one another in a rough sea of emotions. While Alex had been with more than a handful of guys, Jamie surpassed them all. Maybe it was the care with which he handled Alex in the beginning (though the growling kisses and the desperate hands soon won out), or maybe it was the things Jamie had said (you’re amazing, gorgeous, incredible, you feel like nothing I’ve felt before), or perhaps it was just in the way they held each other in those few electric moments in the wake of climax, Jamie’s blue eyes wide and blazing as Alex gasped and stared up in awe. Whatever the case, Alex made a silent vow then and there that Jamie Cook was the only man he ever wanted sleep with again._

In his room in Sheffield, Alex hums as he remembers the angles and the positions, the sound of Jamie’s breath on his skin, the way his name felt murmured into his shoulder. Sharing his own bed with Jamie gave him a funny thrill, something so wildly domestic that it causes Alex to sit up with a quick breath, and check his surroundings. His breathing is wild, deep and erratic, and feels the urge to find Jamie and touch him and kiss him, and be touched in return.

The shower is no longer running. How long has Alex been laying there thinking about that night? The evidence beneath his fly is enough of an indicator that he’s been entertaining those thoughts for a fair amount of time. The ache is sweet, and welcome, and he slides off of the bed and makes his way to the bathroom across the hall.

“Hey, it’s joost me,” Alex calls, grasping the knob with one hand and knocking with the other. “Jameh?” He asks when he doesn’t get an answer right away. He twists the knob, finds it unlocked, and pushes the door wide.

Jamie’s there, standing before the sink wearing nothing but a towel around his hips, and a thick layer of shaving foam on his face, a razor clutched in his right hand.

“What are ya…” Alex trails off, the corner of his mouth going up in curiosity. His eyes dart to the wastebasket next to the toilet and he sees the dark blond curls that made up the bulk of Jamie’s beard laying in the bottom of it.

Jamie shrugs and turns the taps on to fill the sink with warm water. “Joost...cleaning the slate, I suppose,” he laughs, and slips the razor through the water. “Thought that maybe a change of scenery was in order.” He lifts the razor to his face and readies for the first stroke.

“Wait!” Alex gasps, slipping into the bathroom and shutting the door behind him. “Can I...I mean...I want to. Do that.” He gestures at the razor and gives Jamie an expectant look.

“You wanna shave me face?” Jamie asks, a little confused at such a request. Still, he grins at the idea.

Alex nods. “Yes. I don’t rightly know why...but let me?” He holds his hand out expectantly.

Jamie’s eyebrow goes up and he purses his mouth before handing the razor to Alex. “All right,” he murmurs, watching the smile spread on his lover’s face. His expression matches as Alex settles himself on the counter, next to the sink, and opens his knees, indicating that Jamie should stand in that space.

When he gets there, Jamie traps Alex with a hand planted on either side of Alex’s thighs, and he leans forward, aiming to kiss the dark-eyed lad.

Alex moves back, putting a hand on Jamie’s shoulder to keep him at bay. Through a giggle, he says, “Jameh, you’re gonna get shaving foam all over the place.”

“Small price to pay, though.” He tries again, pushing against Alex’s hand, his fingers sliding up from the counter to pressing into Alex’s upper legs, leaving damp fingerprints on the worn denim.

“James,” Alex scolds mockingly. He lifts the razor between them. “Surely you can contain yourself until we’re through?”

Jamie doesn’t answer, he merely growls and narrows his eyes playfully.

“Oooh, so tough, aren’t you, babeh,” Alex purrs, planting a quick kiss on Jamie’s nose. “Now. Hold still, love.”

+

It doesn’t much matter the subject upon which Alex studies, he approaches them all with the same practised ease and intensity. Jamie has seen it dozens of times when Alex is studying for an exam, an oral presentation, making tea, deadheading the clutch of African violets on the windowsill in Jamie’s kitchen: those wide, dark eyes focused on the task, his beautiful, soft mouth relaxed, bottom lip jutted out in the faintest pout. 

This time, it’s different, however. Jamie’s never been the one under Alex’s scrutiny, not this close, and the blond takes a moment to admire the mahogany of Alex’s eyes, the amber flecks there, the long, curling lashes sweeping across pale cheekbones as he looks down to rinse the blade, the scar above his left eyebrow even more prominent at this distance. 

“You’re starin’,” Alex mutters softly, drawing the razor down one of Jamie’s cheeks.

“Can’t help it,” Jamie carefully replies, moving in the direction Alex’s fingers press. “You’re bloody gorgeous, babeh.”

Alex makes an amused sound, a bit of laughter through his nose, and his voice rumbles softly. “Knock it off, James,” he says, rinsing the razor and using his fingertips to press against Jamie’s chin, turning his other cheek.

“You are,” Jamie insists. Casting his gaze down again, he studies in the still of the bathroom, the only sound that of the rough scrape of the razor over his whiskers, and the swishing of water as Alex rinses the blade. “You have freckles on the bridge of your nose.”

Alex pauses and scrunches said nose. “Happens in the sun.”

Jamie’s eyes flit back over the dark waves of hair and he adds, “And your hair gets lighter, too. Gold in some places, russet in others…” His voices has a wistful quality and he feels somewhat foolish, but he knows that he can’t help it.

With a sigh, Alex sits back and gives Jamie a pointed look. “You’re actin’ strange. You have been all mornin’.”

Jamie sputters, and is about to shake his head when Alex catches his jaw with one hand to keep him still. “M’not,” the blond huffs.

“Mmm,” is the only reply from Alex. He taps his own upper lip and Jamie pulls his taut so that Alex can carefully pull the blade down over the sensitive area.

The way Alex handles the razor, and handles Jamie between his thighs make Jamie’s heart flutter the same way it did that morning when they woke. _Could this be_ … Jamie doesn’t let the thought form, and instead takes in more details of Alex, cataloguing them. When Alex speaks, it is with that rolling, broad accent smothered in a deep baritone. He likes the way Alex says his name, too: ‘ _Jameh_ ’ when he wants something or can’t get enough of it, ‘ _Cookeh_ ’ when he wants to tease, ‘ _James_ ’ when he’s trying to get his point across. And though Alex would never agree, he has a fair singing voice, better than Jamie’s anyway. He’d caught Alex singing one or two traditional carols over the holidays, and Alex had blushed, and refused an encore.

A few more passes and then Jamie tilts his head back so that Alex can get the underside of his chin and jaw, and the length of his throat.

“An’ now you’re rather quiet,” Alex tries a few moments later. “What’s on your mind?”

“You,” Jamie shrugs.

“Don’t move - _me_?” Alex goes from scolding to skeptical, and he laces the fingers of his free hand into the back of Jamie’s hair and pulls his head down so that their gazes meet. “What do you mean?”

Jamie takes a breath. Now is as good a time as any to say it - he’d always wanted to say it spontaneously, in a strange moment, something that Alex would remember forever. It’s been bubbling inside of Jamie for days now, if he’s honest, since their arrival at the Cook residence a week prior. But it wasn’t until that morning that Jamie had realised that-

“Alex? Are you in there?”

Alex sighs at his mum’s voice, and rests his forehead against Jamie’s. “Yes, mum.”

“With Jamie?”

He winces and sets the razor down. “ _Yes_ , mum.”

“I thought I said no sharing showers?” Her tone is playful enough.

“We’re not,” Alex drones. “I’m just helping him shave, is all.”

“Well, hurry up, whatever it is you’re doing,” and here she pauses long enough to make Jamie snicker, and cause Alex to blush, “because I need you and Jamie to run into town to Bunz.”

Jamie chuckles. “Bunz?” he mouths slowly. “Sounds like my kind o’place.”

“Shut it,” Alex hisses, smacking Jamie’s bare shoulder. “It’s a bakery, you arse.” He looks to the door. “Right, okay, mum! Be down in a few.” He waits, listening to her receding steps down the hall, and then picks up the razor once more. “Got one more bit to...do…” Alex’s words trail off as he looks at Jamie.

“Wot?” Jamie asks.

Alex blinks a few times and his cheekbones bloom with pink. “I...I joost never seen...I’ve not. You don’t have a beard,” he finally settles on, and it sounds as lame as he expected it might.

Jamie cranes his head past Alex to glimpse at his reflection in the mirror, and he slides his palm over the bare skin. “Feels weird,” he surmises. He turns back to Alex, who is still gaping at Jamie with a look of utter fascination. “Don’t you like it?” Jamie quickly asks, looking back to the mirror.

“C’mere,” Alex stutters, moving to shave the last swath of whiskers. He does so with great care, and then he picks up a nearby towel and wipes away the remaining shaving foam. “How did I do?” he asks softly, eyes a bit dazed as he gazes at Jamie.

Jamie recognizes _that_ look for certain, and his heartbeat speeds up, the familiar tingling ache in his lips brought on by the urge to kiss Alex in this moment. Deftly, Jamie reaches for either side of Alex’s face, cupping those sharp angles gently, tilting the dark head so that he’s got a better angle. “You tell me,” he murmurs, pushing his lips to Alex’s in the next breath.

This is decidedly different for both of them. Almost immediately Alex is moaning into Jamie’s mouth as Jamie’s smooth, warm, fresh-scented skin presses against his face, under his nose, beneath his palm where he moved to cup Jamie’s jaw. Jamie, on the other hand, is spiralling at how close they really are now, and how the slide of Alex’s lips is both cool and warm. The fashion of Alex’s kisses differs, too, and now he sucks at Jamie’s top lip, something he’d never done before, and his tongue slips to trace Jamie’s bottom lip. It’s a smooth, supple playground for the senses, and Alex can’t get enough of it. One of his legs curls behind Jamie’s calves and he pulls the older man in, slipping his arms around Jamie’s torso and moving his head to taste every angle.

And Jamie’s gulping breaths, his fingers fumbling to find purchase in the back pockets of Alex’s jeans as he pulls the smaller lad up from the counter. He notes that his towel falls away and soon enough his cock is nestled against the warm denim of Alex’s groin, the tip nudging against the button as if the damn thing might be pried open by virility alone. Jamie’s hips wind and he groans for Alex, his fingers tugging at Alex’s hair to pull the lad’s head back further so that he can attack the arch of his neck properly.

Alex clutches Jamie’s sides with his knees and falls back with a helpless sigh, his fingers combing through Jamie’s hair, holding that mouth against his throat. Losing himself to something like this has never come this easily, with this level of comfort. Bombarded with sensation, and the tremor of energy between them, it’s in the back of Alex’s head to murmur exactly what he feels in this moment, swept up by the enormity of it all-

Another knock on the door sounds and Alex stiffens against Jamie, who merely chuckles into Alex’s neck. 

“Alex, your mother says she’s sending you to Bunz. If they have them, can you pick up half a dozen miniature treacle tarts?”

The younger man gives a huffy whine at his father’s ill timing. “Yes, Da,” Alex growls.

“Ah, perfect. Um...are you leaving soon? Because they’re usually sold out by noon-”

“Leaving right away, Da,” Alex hisses, glaring at Jamie who’s on the verge of cracking up now.

“Okay then...ta.”

“Jesus fookin’ Christ,” Alex mumbles as he sags against the mirror. “I were really into that,” he admits.

“Hm. Me, too,” Jamie replies. “But something is tellin’ me that maybe we’re not gonna get anythin’ at this point in the day.”

“But it’s been _forever_ ,” Alex whines, crossings his arms over his chest and pouting.

Jamie pauses and does the math. “Well..yeah, it has,” he shrugs, working on rinsing the sink out. “Maybe we can slip away this afternoon?”

“Jamie, I haven’t been home since last summer - Mum and Da still give me a hard time ‘bout missin’ Christmas,” Alex adds archly.

“Don’t try to guilt me about that - you’re the one who wanted to stay.” Jamie smirked, pointing a finger.

“Whatever,” Alex pouts. “Point is I doubt Penny an’ David are gonna let me outta their sight, let alone Aunt Debbie an’ Aunt Marie. All the cousins, too.” Alex frowns as he lists more relatives off.

“You don’t seem so keen on that.”

“I hate small talk, you know that. The chit-chat. The catching up. It’s so fookin’ borin’.”

“Aye but...now we’ve got summat to talk about, don’t we?”

Alex straightens a bit. “What’s that.”

“Well,” Jamie drawls, pausing to bend and gather his towel from the floor, “for starters, there’s _me_. I’m quite the catch, in case you didn’t know.”

“Don’t be a dick,” Alex grunts, slipping off of the counter and following Jamie across the hall to his bedroom once more.

“Hey, c’mon now, I _am_. Secondly, I’m certain that your mother has passed me picture round’ the family circle here. That picture of me outside of the library back in October. Still had me beard. So, you’ve got a man, a rather good one, who also cleans up well.” Jamie winks and starts rooting through his suitcase.

“Or,” Alex purrs, “I could tell them that I got rid of the mountain man and found meself someone more respectable.”

“You could do that, too,” Jamie nodded. “Wouldn’t that be a scandal? ‘Poor Jamie went off to school in Amsterdam an’ I was joost too fookin’ horny to wait so this is James-’ _Ow_!” Jamie’s miniature tirade is cut short as Alex throws a copy of Moby Dick at him. It clips Jamie in the shoulder and Jamie huffs indignantly, and picks up the book. “This is how you treat a classic?”

“Hmph,” Alex snarks. “Never liked it anyway.”

“Oh?” Jamie’s eyebrow goes up and he tosses the book over his shoulder, moving across the room until he’s backed Alex into the bed. Alex has no choice but to sink to the mattress and scoot back as Jamie crawls over him. “An’ what do you like?” Jamie asks, his eyes tracking over Alex’s body.

“Dickens,” Alex answers smartly, jutting his chin out.

Jamie rolls his eyes. “What else?”

“Erm...Whitman.”

“And?” Jamie asks expectantly.

“Let’s see...Hawthorne isn’t so bad.”

“Al,” Jamie growls. “What about Dante?”

“Dante? Pffft, he’s rather boring, wouldn’t you say?”

Jamie narrows his eyes. “Boring? That’s not exactly the impression you gave me that night in the library.”

Smirking, Alex loops his arms behind Jamie’s neck and pulls the older man closer. “I think I need a refresher course.”

+

They decide to drive to Bunz. It’s a bit of a jaunt, and if they want to fill David Turner’s order for treacle tarts, they need to make double time. The walk would have probably done them both good: there’s a palpable tension between them, and it amplifies in the small confines of David Turner’s ancient maroon Mercedes. With Alex behind the wheel, Jamie’s mind is left to wander, and his gaze does the same, flicking from Alex’s face, to his hands, to his legs beneath those worn jeans, back up to leanly muscled arms hidden under the long sleeves of a blue and purple striped Henley. Absently, he sings along with the tune on the radio, shifting gears and pointing out where he learned how to ride a bike, where he had his first kiss with a girl (“ _Not very convincing in the gay-straight argument_ ,” he adds with a wrinkle of his nose), where he had his first snog with a boy (which Jamie actually knows the story behind), and part of the route he and his best friend Matt would walk home from school before Matt got his liscense.

“You’ll meet Helders today,” Alex beams, glancing towards Jamie. He blushes at the look on Jamie’s face, shifts in his seat, and then looks back to the road. “Feels like I haven’t seen him in forever.”

Of course, Jamie knows who Matt Helders is. Once he’d worked out the combination to open Alex’s personal side, Jamie had been privy to a part of Alex he’d never seen before, but eagerly welcomed. He was very candid, and very funny, intelligent, well-spoken, and, Jamie guessed, probably misunderstood, especially when he was younger. He’s eager to finally meet Matt, and finds he’s a bit crestfallen that Mal and Kelly hadn’t been in the Liverpool area when he and Alex had visited last week.

They park the car across the street from the bakery. Bunz is housed in a tiny corner plot in a strip of small shops, encased all in glass with the name painted in big, bubbly, pink letters outlined in gold. There’s a small seating area outside, and most of the tables are already taken. Customers come and go, the latter carrying paper bags, and pink pastry boxes tied with strings.

“Pretty popular, eh?” Jamie remarks as he steps out of the car.

“You could say that. They’ve been in that spot for as long as I can remember.”

“Was it always called ‘Bunz’?” Jamie comes around to Alex’s side of the car and automatically reaches for his hand.

“No,” Alex chuckles. “Name changed when new owners took over. Still the same recipes though, going right back to the twenties for some of them.” He squeezes Jamie’s hand in his and then quickly presses his lips to Jamie’s cheek. “Don’t think I’ll ever be used to you without a beard.”

Jamie grins and nods. “Aye, reyt that. Me face is cold.”

“Should have brought a scarf for ya,” Alex muses, beaming up at Jamie.

“It’s the middle of June,” Jamie points out.

“Aye, an’ we’re in England, Jamie, or did you forget that?” He motions to Jamie’s shorts.

“M’wearin’ a jumper,” he counters, plucking at the hem of his hooded sweater.

“C’mon,” Alex laughs. “There might be a table inside where we can sit an’ have a hot cocoa.”


	2. Chapter 2

“I thought you said he had a beard?” Matt Helders utters as he sidles up next to Alex in the Turner’s back yard. 

Alex looks up from the drink he’s pouring to find Jamie standing next to his dad at the barbecue, holding a beer in one hand and a plate in the other, laughing at something his dad has said.

“He did,” Alex shrugs. “This morning, at least.”

“He’s a good lookin’ guy,” Matt continues, reaching for the spoon wedged into a bowl of potato salad. “He treat you well?”

“Matt,” Alex laughs. “Course he does.”

“M’joost askin’ a quesiton,” Matt states matter-of-factly. “I gotta know these things, aye? Gotta make sure me best mate is in good ‘ands.” There’s a strange, thick quality to Matt’s voice and Alex picks up on it, turning towards his best friend.

“I...yeah, mate, I mean…” Alex’s mouth curves into a small, knowing smile as he replays that moment in the bakery from that morning.

_They’d been nearing the front of the line, Alex craning his neck to gaze in the pastry case and confirm that there were in fact treacle tarts for his father. The list from his mother included two dozen hamburger buns and two dozen sausage rolls, and those baskets behind the counter were plenty full. The bakery was full of patrons, and the buzz was electric as the employees behind the counter laughed and chatted, and those from the neighbourhood caught up with one another. The scent of cinnamon and sugar and yeast permeated the air, which was warm and comforting against the morning drizzle._

_“D’ya see any, Jamie?” Alex breathes, turning to look at Jamie who stands beside him._

_But Jamie’s not looking at the glass case at the front of the store. He’s staring at Alex._

_Again._

_“Okay, what is it,” Alex grouses, cocking an eyebrow at Jamie. “You’ve been starin’ at me all morning, an’ actin’ funny, too, like you’ve got summat on your mind but you don’t quite know how-”_

_“I love you.”_

_“-to say it. Wait. What?”_

_Jamie bites his lip and leans towards Alex, putting his mouth next to Alex’s ear. “I love you, Al.” Slowly, he leans back, and finds that Alex has closed his eyes, his mouth parted ever so slightly._

_“Oh,” is Alex’s eloquent reply._

_“Ehhh,” Jamie frowns and tries to process the syllable Alex has breathed._

_Suddenly, Alex’s eyes fly open, wide and intoxicating as whiskey straight up. He blinks a few times, feels his cheeks heat, and sees the dismay in Jamie’s expression. “Oh! I...Jamie, I…” He pauses, takes a deep breath and leans close to the blond. “Love you, too,” he smiles._

_The look of relief that floods Jamie’s expression is somewhat troubling to Alex. Didn’t Jamie know how he felt? Isn’t that why Jamie had said it? Alex frowns._

_And Jamie laughs. “I think we’re supposed to kiss or summat afterwards. I...didn’t calculate the frown into the equation.”_

_“You just…” Alex makes an array of hand gestures and sighs as the queue moves forward. “I wanna kiss you, baby,” he mutters. “Believe me, I want nothing more, but I think that’s me third grade teacher over there and she looks about ready to keel over any moment - I’d hate to be the one to give her the shock that put her in her grave.”_

_Jamie quirks an eyebrow. “You think there are people in here that don’t know we’re together? We’re practically standin’ on top o’ one another an, like you said, I’ve been starin’ at you all mornin’.”_

_Narrowing his eyes, he studies Jamie for a moment. “You’re right,” Alex murmurs. “You’ve always been the one to pull away at the last second, to brush my fingers but never hold my hand for too long. Now you’re staring. Now you’re pourin’ your heart all over me. What changed?”_

_“I dunno,” Jamie breathes, stepping further into Alex’s space. They’re two persons back from the front of the queue, and Jamie’s gaze strays to the glass case showcasing the array of pastries for a second, and then returns to Alex. “Guess maybe...I changed. For the better. You know, at me Da’s house I started thinkin’ that maybe I could get used to the idea of us as a longtime thing. No one’s ever been able to get Da to open up like that about Mum. An’ then you bring me here an’ you show me this whole other side of you I’ve never known but I’ve been dying to meet. I loved wakin’ up in your bed in your childhood room this morning, I love wakin’ up with you, and goin’ t’bed with you, an’ shopping for the perfect sweater with you. I love you, Alex. There’s treacle tarts, by the way.”_

_Alex listened in a love-soaked haze, and when Jamie was done talking, Alex replied, “Fook the tarts, Jamie, an’ kiss me already.” He waited half a heartbeat and looped his arms around Jamie’s neck, taking them both by surprise with the ferocity of his kiss. It was chaste, but unhurried, and they heard a few people murmur appropriately. Finally, the person behind them tapped Jamie on the shoulder and indicated that it was their turn to order. The pair of them blushed furiously, said their apologies, and turned to make their selections._

An obscene squirt of ketchup brings Alex back to the present where he stands at one of tables laden with food, watching Matt dress a bun for a burger. His relatives and closest family friends fill the backyard, and he realizes with a giddy flip of his stomach that Jamie is among those present, and he belongs to Alex.

“I love him,” Alex says quietly, glancing at to where Matt arranges pickles over the ketchup crosshatch he’s designed.

The corner of Matt’s mouth goes up, his dimple appears, and he chuckles. “Yeah, I kinda got that what with your moon-eyed stare an’ all.” Matt pops a few of the pickles into his mouth and chews for a moment. “Not to mention the fact that you’re blushing right now, and you do every time you look at him.”

“Shut up,” Alex murmurs.

“An’ you’re not eatin’, either. C’mon, this is Aunt Deb’s potato salad - remember when we were eight an’ you sat there on the back stoop with one arm in a cast, the other one slung around the bowl while you managed to scoop potato salad into your mouth with the wooden spoon?”

“Oh god, I thought I was gonna die on the toilet that night,” Alex groans, remembering the moment quite clearly. “Remember the ambrosia incident?”

“We shall not speak of that,” Matt replied smartly. “At least, not with Breana here, aye?” His dark blue eyes cut across the lawn to the petite brunette with a pixie cut, holding one of Alex’s second cousins on her hip while she smiled at the other small kids running around. Matt’s smile spread immediately, before he turned back to Alex. “I’m still tryna impress her. You an’ Jamie seem to be practically married, he can handle an embarrassing story or three.”

“Well, she looks about ready to take on a brood of children, Matt; how long have you been with her? A year, give or take?”

Matt shrugs. “‘Bout that, yeah.”

“Oh, that’s plenty of time then. Breana, love!” Alex calls and waves, and then steps away from the table towards the woman in question. “Have I ever told you about the Ambrosia Incident?”

+

The afternoon slowly creeps into the evening, and the coolers are refilled with ice, glass bottles of jewel-colored soda in one, and beers and cider in the other. The lunch fare has been cleared, but there’s still plenty of food being toted out - things for a midnight lunch, it seems, things to pick at while games of horseshoes are set up on the lawn. At the far end of the yard a dart board has been hung, and more of Alex’s family and friends crowd there. The strings of lanterns are turned on, the fire pit is lit, and twilight sets in.

Alex looks up from where he arranges a tray of cheese and crackers, as directed by his mum, and scans the yard for Jamie. He’s been such a gracious sport all afternoon, bombarded by question after question in regards to his school, his future career, his past, his hobbies - Jamie’s a social creature, Alex knows this, but he also knows that the Turner clan can be a bit overbearing. Finally he spots the blond man near the gate that leads to the front of the house, cornered there by none other than his Aunt Deb and one of his mum’s coworkers, Alice McNaughten. 

By the shade of red creeping up from Jamie’s collar to spread on his cheeks, Alex is fairly certain he’s getting grilled about his and Alex’s relationship, and possibly being harmlessly flirted with, but flirted with nonetheless. Aunt Deb is a little notorious in that respect, and Alice, Alex had learned, was newly divorced last fall. He has no doubt that his mum mentioned that Jamie wasn’t gay, but bisexual, and Alex knew that some people figured he was fair game. He wasn’t threatened at all - these women were at least twenty-five years their senior. Still, a small sliver of a possessive streak tore through Alex’s normally cool facade, and he excused himself from where he was casually chatting with a few of his cousins to investigate further.

+

“Thank you,” Jamie chuckles once they’ve cleared the back gate and are scuffing up the path that leads to the woods. “I was beginning to run out of ways to deflect your aunt’s attention. She knows that we’re together, right?”

Alex snickers. “Yes, Jameh. She knows. Though that’s never stopped her before. Trust me, she’s hit on boys I’ve brought home in the past, and they were one hundred percent homosexual.” Glacing to Jamie, Alex worries his bottom lip. “You’re not...like...uncomfortable, are you? She doesn’t meen owt by it, really, she just loves good looking men.”

“And I fall into that category, eh?” Jamie asks, quirking an eyebrow.

“Now that you’ve gotten rid of the beard, aye, you fit rather well I think.”

“Are you saying I wasn’t good looking before?” Jamie tries to sound hurt as he absently rubs at his bare chin.

“No,” Alex shrugs. He shifts the folded blanket he nicked from the porch swing and tucks it under his other arm. “Perhaps a little more...rugged. More mountain-man type, or summat. I’ll admit that when I first saw you, I thought you’d look more in place wearing a plaid shirt with an axe slung over your shoulder.”

“Deep seated lumberjack fantasy?”

Alex spread his arms wide to indicate the forest they were now walking in. “What can I say? I spent a lot of my formative years down here. The young boy in me has always _pined_ for a big, burly man wiv a trusty axe. An’ some serious wood.”

Jamie blinks at Alex and for a moment wonders if perhaps Alex is telling a half-truth. Then he rolls his eyes and gently knocks the smaller lad aside with his shoulder. “That were a terrible pun.”

“Hmmm, but you still love me don’t you?”

Jamie knows Alex is being playful, but he takes the question quite seriously, given their morning, and he stops Alex in the middle of the path with his hands on Alex’s shoulders. He slides his palms up to cup Alex’s neck, his thumbs trace the underside of that sharp jaw, and for a moment he just looks at Alex like he, or himself, or both might be crazy. The breeze cuts through the tops of the trees, and the last of the birds chatter as they settle into the night.

“I love you - I’m _in_ love with you, baby. Always.”

“God, James, don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hearin’ that.” Alex steps in and pushes a kiss to Jamie’s lips.

They part a few seconds later, and Jamie taps the worn blanket bundled under Alex’s arm. “Hopin’ for a little backwoods action, then?”

Alex giggles and lifts his narrow shoulders. “I dunno,” he sighs. “But there’s a pretty view by the lake. Thought maybe you’d like a chance to take a break from the Turner clan an’ all that.”

“I thought you were the introvert,” Jamie grins as he lets Alex lead him down the path. 

“I am. But me family always brings me out me shell, it seems.”

“I like your family.”

“I like yours,” Alex counters, his voice laden with sincerity.

“Even me uncles?” Jamie asks hesitantly, remembering the footie game that had transpired one afternoon.

“ _Especially_ your uncles,” Alex winks. “C’mon,” he says a moment later, nodding to the downward slope of the path. “It’s this way, just a little further.”

+

“Do you think you benefitted from growing up in Sheffield? I mean, High Green isn’t necessarily buzzing like Liverpool is.”

They’ve laid the blanket out on the relatively sandy shore, Jamie having kicked the bigger boulders aside, and now Alex is laying back, Jamie’s sweater bundled under his head like a pillow, his arms folded beneath his head, while he watches Jamie do what he calls, ‘cutting the devil’s throat’. This consists of finding a flat stone no bigger than a box of matches, curving the forefinger around it, and throwing it straight up into the air with a backspin, so that it cuts into the surface of the water with a sound somewhere between a _zip_ and a _whoosh_. It’s a strange sound, but it’s comforting, thought Alex isn’t sure why. 

“Alex?” Jamie calls, turning from the water’s edge to look at his boyfriend.

“Hmm?” Alex blinks dreamily. “Oh, er...yeah…” He remembers that Jamie’s asked him a question. “I dunno, y’know, when you’re younger, you’re always thinkin’ it’s better elsewhere. I mean, at the time Matt an’ I were bored out our skulls a lot. We had to come up with our own fun, that sorta thing, at least until I got me license.”

“Where did you go when you did get your license.”

Alex chuckles and sits up, watching as Jamie throws another stone. “Same places we did before. Only we went in a car instead of on our bikes.”

Jamie laughs, and turns from the shoreline once the stone has landed. He eyes Alex thoughtfully. “Did you still come down here?”

“Oh, absolutely. This were kinda like...I mean it’s public land, but no one ever seems to come down here. Least not whenever we were down here. When we were kids, it was biking and baloney sandwiches an’ sunburns, aye? Spent a lot of time down here, especially in the summers. When I got older, got a car, started workin’, the days were kinda eaten up. We’d come down here a lot at night. Beer instead of baloney, tha knows? Not sunburns, but skinny dipping.”

“Oh, aye?” Jamie murmurs, raising an eyebrow.

Alex looks closely at the blond as he approaches the blanket. Jamie pauses and bends to untie his boots, and he toes them off before stepping onto the blanket. Dropping to his knees before Alex, he slowly crawls over him until he had no choice but to lean back onto his elbows, his knees widening to accommodate Jamie as he giggles softly. Jamie finally comes to a stop, his forearms on either side of Alex, their pelvises locked together, and Jamie rocks them slowly, like the waves behind them.

“Jamie,” Alex purrs, reaching a hand to sift his fingers through Jamie’s hair. “You’ve got that look in your eye.”

“What look is that,” Jamie asks huskily, his eyes dancing from Alex’s gaze to his lips, to his throat, and back up.

“Like you’re plannin’ summat.”

“Let’s go for a swim.”

Alex snorts. “Now?”

“No, next Tuesday,” Jamie deadpans. “Yes, _now_. C’mon,” Jamie grins, sitting back and taking up one of Alex’s hands to pull him up.

“Jamie we can’t-”

“Why not?” Jamie asks, standing, already reaching for the hem of his t shirt. He’s pulled the soft, blue cotton up and off of his torso before Alex has a chance to form an answer, and then his fingers are fumbling with his belt and the button to his jeans.

“ _Jamie_!” Alex hisses. He glances around as if someone might be watching. “What if we get caught?”

Pausing with his thumb on the tab to his zipper, Jamie gives Alex a quizzical look. “What if we...Alex...how many times did you do this when you were a teenager?”

 

Alex bites his lips and glances at the blanket, absently picking the threads there. “Skinny-dipping? Or, like...skinny-dipping wiv a man I love? Cuz if it’s the latter, then my answer is zero.”

Jamie’s heart flips in his chest and he shakes his head at Alex’s apprehension, falling to his knees once more and reaching to cup Alex’s face. “So let’s make it one, and hopefully again and again in the future. C’mon, I’ll make it worth your while, promise.”

+

“It’s fookin’ freezin’ in here,” Alex huffs, his naked skin pulling into gooseflesh with every step he takes.

Jamie’s already fully submerged, having run to the shore stark naked after Alex had aquicised and stripped down to the raw. Now he wades a ways out, and pushes his hands back through his hair, sweeping it from his face to watch Alex wobble, hesitantly making his way into the dark water.

“Joost dive in, trust me, love, it’s better that way!” Jamie calls.

Alex pauses with a frown and contemplates Jamie’s suggestion.

“If you come out here I’ll keep you warm, promise.”

Glancing down, Alex notes the sorry state his dick has taken on in response to the temperature of the water.

“I can help wiv that, too.” Jamie’s laugh is clear and loud in the still night.

“Oh, shut the fook up, Cookie,” Alex huffs. He then goes on to psyching himself up for the plunge. _Just do it. You know this lake, there ain’t nowt to do but jump in, c’mon_. After a few seconds, and more of Jamie’s cajoling, Alex takes a breath and dives under the surface, the cold enveloping him as he does so.

He swims a few feet before surfacing, and he sputters and wipes his hair from his eyes. As the water clears his ears he hears Jamie’s approving laughter, and then he’s pulled into a strong, warm embrace, and tugged further into the water. Automatically Alex’s legs wrap around Jamie’s hips, his arms loop those shoulders, and he presses his bare chest against Jamie’s, reveling in the heat, and the scratch of those chest hairs. He hums.

“There now,” Jamie whispers, his words wet with lake water, their mouths barely an inch apart. “That’s better, aye?” His hands have moved to Alex’s waist, one slipping down to slide over the length of the outside of Alex’s thigh and back, cupping one pert arse cheek. He squeezes and grins. The dark-eyed man is beautiful like this, soaking wet hair plastered to his graceful neck, his bottom lip jutting out, and Jamie can’t resist stealing a cold kiss from Alex’s mouth

“Don’t you start,” Alex mumbles with a shiver. “M’not havin’ sex in the lake.”

Jamie’s answer is to slip both hands around to Alex’s ass and pull the lad closer to him. “C’mon, it’ll warm you up,” Jamie rasps, angling his head to kiss Alex again. He keeps his eyes half open as his tongue presses against Alex’s. Blood races under his skin; despite the cold water Jamie is soon hard, nestled into the crease where Alex’s pelvis joins his thigh. Twisting his hips, he smiles into another round of kissing, one that leaves Alex panting when Jamie finally pulls away.

Weightless in the water, the depth of Jamie’s kiss makes Alex even more buoyant. He can’t resist the look in Jamie’s eyes, nor the way his cheeks are flushed, and his jaw too. Without the beard, another side of Jamie is revealed - this one more physical, but nonetheless fascinating, and Alex moves to press his face into Jamie’s cheek, and draw the tip of his nose down all of that newly revealed skin. Humming, his fingers trace over Jamie’s back, along the bumps of his spine and out over the flexing muscles of his torso. His own hips push against Jamie and he groans gently, his mouth moving to taste Jamie’s ear.

“Thought you said we weren’t havin’ sex in here,” Jamie whispers, recognizing the shift in Alex’s kisses. That young mouth is hasty, and insistent, and Jamie’s hands tighten their hold.

“We’re not,” Alex mumbles, half-cut on the liquor of Jamie’s flavour. “I’m joost makin’ me intentions clear for when we get out.”

“Let’s get out now,” Jamie decides hurriedly, already moving towards the shore.

Suddenly, Alex is slipping from his grasp and pushing away with a playful laugh. “Gotta catch me first, Cookie,” Alex purrs, pushing his hand into the water and creating a wave that sprays Jamie in the face.

Sputtering, Jamie growls with a grin, and lunges after Alex.

+

Jamie carries Alex from the water, the smaller man complaining that he didn’t want to get his feet sandy and walk all over the blanket. Depositing Alex on the blanket, Jamie kisses the tip of his nose and then snags his boots from nearby, and heads to the water again. He’ll rinse his feet off and then put his shoes on right away; as he does so, he watches Alex shuffle his feet along the blanket and then reach for his socks, which he tugs on in a rather humorous flex of gangly limbs and attempts at keeping his balance. He finds his sneakers next, and Jamie heads up the beach, grinning at the sight: Alex, bare-assed naked save for his socks and sneakers, rummaging through the pile of their clothing, searching for the pieces that belong to him.

Alex hears Jamie’s boots crunching along the larger stones up at this end of the shore, and he turns, holding his jeans and Jamie’s sweater in a bundle directly in front of his groin. It’s not that he’s embarrassed, it’s just he’s feeling a mite exposed out here. And the way Jamie is looking at him makes Alex pause, and then take a step back, off of the blanket. 

“You startin' summat?” Alex murmurs, lowering his lashes and looking up through them as Jamie approaches. Alex keeps backing up until he bumps into one of the picnic tables set in a small clearing. Jamie’s stooped to catch the corner of the blanket as he passed it, and now he’s looming over Alex, eyeing the lad, and eyeing the table, his tongue running over his lips.

“You started it in the lake,” Jamie points out, giving the blanket a rough shake to get the sand off. He flings it around behind Alex’s shoulders and wraps them both in it, pressing his body tightly against the smaller man.

“I did,” Alex mumbles with a faint nod. “I did do that.”

Jamie nods, too, and then before he can make his move, Alex is grabbing him, kissing him, dropping the clothing he was clutching, and sliding a leg up behind Jamie’s thigh, hooking him with a sneakered foot. Stumbling, Jamie ends up pinning Alex against the table, which only seems to ignite the fuse between them. Alex’s mouth turns rough, and his hands are the same as he scrapes over the damp, tepid skin of Jamie’s torso and slides his fingers down into the dark blond hair of Jamie’s groin. 

He cups Jamie firmly, squeezing, the palm of his hand creating friction and pressure that has the blond panting into Alex’s mouth. Jamie’s hand mimics Alex’s, and soon they’ve each got a fistful of hard flesh, both of them moving the way they know the other likes it, tongues tangling in a wild, open-mouthed kiss.

Before this goes further, Jamie pulls back with a wet gasp, and he ducks and searches blindly through the pile of clothes at Alex’s feet. Finding his jeans, he jambs his hands into the pockets, finding the few little foil packages of lube he’s prone to carrying these days. He digs around some more, time stretching, and Alex grows impatient.

“Jameh,” Alex growls, threading his fingers into Jamie’s hair and giving it a playful tug. “Come _on_.”

Jamie can’t find the condom, figures it fell out somewhere on the beach when they were undressing, but Alex is already pulling him to his feet and kissing him again. With a resigned groan, Jamie gives in, and his fingers flit between them as he tears on packet of lube open, squeezes, and spreads it while he licks Alex’s mouth. The smaller man shudders, and then takes both of them up in his hand with a wicked grin. Jamie’s head falls back with a sigh, and he lets Alex take over.

To compensate for the difference in height, Alex hops back onto the picnic table, blanket tucked under his backside and sliding from his shoulders. Knees spread, he maneuvers Jamie between them, and lines their erections up again. He strokes quick, both of his fists coming into play while he looks up at Jamie, whose face is screwed up in what can only be described as agonizing pleasure. His hips are winding already; Alex can see the desperate desire with every twitch of Jamie’s body. He lifts one hand to tuck his fingers into Jamie’s fist, finding the other small packet. He tugs in a silent message, and Jamie opens his eyes to find Alex’s wide brown stare fixed on him, hot and open. Jamie groans, and bends to fuse their mouths together.

“Want you,” Alex mumbles against Jamie’s lips, pulling his knees back, widening them, making it perfectly clear where he wants Jamie, and how.

Jamie’s mind is reeling. There’s something about this night, about being naked under the stars and swimming naked in dark water, about not having a beard, that’s making things seem a million more times intense than it’s ever been with Alex before. Before he knows it he’s hovering over Alex, who is splayed back on the table, dark hair drying in wild curls, his mouth the same.

“C’mon, babeh,” Alex sighs, closing his eyes and arching his back as Jamie’s fingers search, circle, push. His bottom lip quivers, and a deep, throaty moan sails up as he angles his hips to meet Jamie part way. “Oh, god, _yes_ ,” he sighs. “Yes, babeh, like that,” and he wraps his hands around Jamie’s wrist and helps fuck himself with Jamie’s fingers.

Jamie grips his cock with his other hand, stroking in time with Alex’s hips. He wants him, wants him in all ways, and says as much, but Alex hears the hesitation in his voice.

“What’s wrong,” Alex pants, halfway sitting up, tongue curling over his lip, his hips still rocking.

“Dropped the condom somewhere back there,” Jamie grunts, flicking his head back towards the beach. “An’ I just-”

“Jameh,” Alex cuts him off, his hips twisting slowly, long lashes fluttering. “I want you. I want you _now_.”

“But-”

“Nowt between us,” Alex softly explains, his face falling to impishly innocent, cheekbones flushing.

“Oh - _oh_.” Jamie’s heart is pounding at Alex’s request.

They’ve been sleeping together for a little over six months, and always, always have played it safe, despite their pact to get regular tests, which always come back clean as a whistle. Of course Jamie’s thought about fucking - about making love to Alex without a condom; the idea is dazzling and electrifying. It seems as though Alex has thought about it a time or two as well.

“I love you, Jameh,” Alex murmurs, moving a hand to cover Jamie’s where he still slowly strokes his cock. “An’ I wanna be with you.” His gaze never wavers; if anything it intensifies, and steeles Jamie’s in place. “Always with you,” Alex continues, “and _only_ wiv you,” he finishes, his voice gone thick, consonants switching places.

The admission sends a swirl of arousal twisting through Jamie’s belly, and he’s fairly certain his heart is going to explode at any moment. Jamie swallows thickly and nods, and there’s something about the way his eyes are so bright in the moonlight that makes Alex feel safe. 

Alex’s resulting expression softens the angles of his face, skin like the moon overhead: smooth, pale, perfect. Everywhere else he’s hot and tingling, and Jamie is a livewire against him, his broad-palmed hands pushing his damp hair aside to kiss his cheek, his jaw, his neck and collarbones, down the center of his chest and back up. Alex is tuned into everything, from the sound of Jamie’s boots against the gravel, his own breath catching in his throat, and the wiry scratch and tickle of the hair on Jamie’s thighs as it scrapes the soft skin on the inside of Alex’s. He feels hyper-tense, and he’s grabbing onto Jamie frantically, whimpering, on the verge of begging. He knows the heat and swell of Jamie’s cock, knows what it feels like when he slips in-

Everything stops, time, the waves, his heart, Jamie’s breath, maybe even the rotation of the earth.

This is so different from anything he’s felt before.

+

_I love you_.

It’s all Jamie can think about over and over as he slowly pushes into the infinite, staggering heat of Alex’s body. There’s nothing between them; nothing _will_ ever come between them, nothing they can’t handle, but this...this is almost overwhelming and Jamie’s thighs shake as he comes full stop, completely inside of Alex.

Alex’s lips are moving as if he’s trying to say something. Finally, they settle on a small, beautiful smile that makes Jamie sigh, and sink down to his elbows so that their chests are pressed together, and Alex’s ankles lock at the small of Jamie’s back.

“You feel fookin’ incredible, Jameh,” Alex murmurs, his eyes falling to half mast. He gives a little roll of his hips and his smile grows as his spine curves off of the table.

Jamie hisses at the silky glide, the hot clasp, and the angle of Alex’s body, and he pushes his face into Alex’s neck with a moan, rolling his own hips gently. He has to start small, and build - if he doesn’t, he’ll come too quickly, and he wants this moment to last forever.

Winding his arms around the man above him, Alex anchors Jamie to his body and finds his tempo, daring it to speed up. He’s feeling so much in the moment, and he knows Jamie is too, because Jamie shudders and gasps, and pulls up short, balanced on one hand, his other sliding down and under to hold Alex’s hips closer to his as he grinds and sweeps and thrusts.

Soon enough Alex is whimpering, distraught, and he somehow manages to signal Jamie that he needs more, a different angle, something different. Always able to read the younger man, Jamie obliges, and soon Alex’s ass is balanced on the edge of the picnic table, the blanket his gran made keeping the slivers at bay, as Jamie hands move to hook behind Alex’s knees, splaying those gorgeous thighs further, and pushing them back. Here he can snap more readily into Alex’s body and he does so, quickly, with determination, making Alex’s voice catch with every thrust.

Jamie grins. Alex is starting to babble already, and he hasn’t even gotten started. Slowing half a beat, Alex growls impatiently as Jamie winds his arm behind Alex’s back and changes angles once more, nodding as Alex’s hands clutch his biceps. Those narrow hips are moving back against his; and Jamie nods again, staring down at where Alex’s body takes him raw, and another bolt of pleasure shoots up his spine.

“Fook, yes, babeh, that looks so good,” Jamie whispers hotly.

Alex’s answering moan rattles against the trees looming above and he keens, and bucks into Jamie harder, panting his need. “Fookin’ love you, Jameh,” Alex growls, fucking Jamie back. “So good, yeah, babeh? Hmm? Do I feel good?”

“On fookin’ fire,” Jamie gulps, gathering Alex in his arms and pounding into him. “Oh, god, Alex, why the _fuck_ didn’t we do this before?”

Alex laughs breathlessly and shakes his head, the waves of his hair fanning over his neck and shoulders. “I blame you,” he pants. “Always wantin’ to take it so slow.”

“Want it fast?” Jamie asks archly, raising his eyebrow.

Alex purses his lips and nods, and slings an arm around Jamie’s neck, and braces himself. “C’mon an’ fuck me, Jameh.”

“Fuck me back,” Jamie pants, slipping his tongue into Alex’s mouth. 

So Alex does, and Jamie’s mounting pleasure narrows in focus.

Squeezing Jamie with his thighs, Alex lets his other hand fall between them and he takes control of his orgasm. Tilting his hips another fraction causes Jamie’s cock to glance off of that knot of nerves deep inside and it sends Alex reeling, his cry poured into Jamie’s mouth. Pulling away with a gasp Alex arches back and drives his hips down harder, wailing loudly as he roughly strokes himself.

“Oh, god, Alex. Oh, fuck, oh fuck, hnnnnfuck, Alex, babeh, that’s it, that’s right, oh _god_ ,” Jamie babbles, straining to keep himself in control until Alex is ready. “Please tell me you’re gonna come,” he whimpers. Lifting a hand to brush the hair from Alex’s face, Jamie stares into those wide, dark eyes. “Fuck, _please_ , Alex, m’so close.”

Turning his head, Alex catches Jamie’s thumb in his mouth and he sucks it hard, wrapping his tongue around it, scraping his teeth over it, before releasing it with a wet pop. That thumb is then pressed to Alex’s bottom lip, down his chin, and along his throat and over his chest until Jamie’s hand is braced over Alex’s pounding heart. Alex nods, and gives his hips another angle. “Oh, _fuck_ , right _there_ , Jamie, fuckin’ fuck me, oh god, m’gonna...yes, Jamie, now, baby, come inside….oh god, come inside me.”

Jamie huffs proudly at Alex's display, and he nods, pushing to his toes to thrust deep, and hard.

Alex’s eyes roll back, and flutter closed. “Give it to me, Jameh,” he whispers softly. “Wanna feel it.”

Jamie’s orgasm rushes the home stretch and careens into him, and into Alex, with a whorl of white hot pleasure at blinding speed. He can hear himself cry out, sharp, rough, ragged, as he drags Alex up against him and continues to rock his hips. Then, Alex is moaning uncontrollably and arching into Jamie, his eyes gone wide with shocked lust and furious pleasure as he feels the heat that Jamie brings with every pump of his hips, every spurt of love. 

For a few seconds they merely stare at one another, gasping and shivering as they both come down from their high. Jamie rubs firm, soothing circles into Alex’s thighs and kisses him softly, and Alex purrs in response, combing his fingers back through Jamie’s hair. His body still flexes around Jamie’s length, and Alex feels boneless and delightfully heavy as he lets Jamie’s weight pin him to the table. A few more moments and Jamie’s twitching, reluctant to disengage, but knowing that it can’t be comfortable for Alex for too much longer. As he pulls away, Alex gasps, and his hands catch Jamie’s waist.

Alex hisses, shaking his hair from his eyes, and glances down between them. They’re both covered in Alex’s climax, and when he sees Jamie’s cock emerge, unwrapped, red, shining, Alex blushes hotly and bites his lip. The heat in his face only intensifies when Jamie reaches down on a whim and gently sweeps his fingers over Alex’s tender arse. He’s soaked, from lube, and from Jamie’s spending, and his voice catches in his throat as Jamie raises those shiny fingertips between them. Spurred by the moment Alex grasps his wrist and opens his mouth for a taste, a move that makes Jamie’s eyes cross with a shaking moan. The way Alex smiles around Jamie’s fingers makes Jamie groan and fall back down on top of Alex, where he kisses him, and tastes them both at once.

Not much is said as they pull apart and slowly begin to dress - not verbally, at least. Their eyes say enough, cutting to one another as they don piece after piece of clothing until they more or less look like they did when they left Alex’s parents’ back yard, save for the colour in their cheeks, and the wild nature of their hair.

“Think anyone will catch on?” Alex murmurs as they step back onto the path that will take them back home.

“We were gone for quite some time,” Jamie points out.

“Yeah, but like...I mean, we were joost out fer a walk,” Alex points out, batting his lashes.

“Yes, and the look Aunt Deb shot your way when you procured the blanket didn’t say she knew exactly what we were up to?”

Alex pauses and studies Jamie, and then laughs, and shoulders the blond aside. “I don’t fookin’ care,” he decides, his face and expression of pure happiness.

Jamie takes note and curls his hand around Alex’s, and pulls the lad towards him on the path, stopping him in his tracks. Alex’s laughter simmers to a rough giggle and he shakes his hair from his face as he looks up at Jamie. 

“Wot?” Alex whispers.

“This is a good look for you,” Jamie murmurs, bending for a kiss.

“What is?”

“Love,” Jamie replies a split second before he tastes Alex’s lips.

“Hmmm,” Alex ponders against Jamie’s mouth. “ _Your_ love.”

“Aye,” Jamie rasps. He moves to deepen the kiss when the sound of footsteps above them on the path cut through the still air.

They both look up in time to see Matt and Breana stumbling a bit drunkenly towards them, both completely lost in one another, looking at each other in a similar fashion Jamie and Alex are. 

When they finally notice the other pair on the path, Matt grins at both Jamie and Alex, and wraps his arms around Breana, pulling her in tight. “How’s the water, then?” Matt asks lightly.

Jamie curls an arm over Alex’s shoulder, and Alex leans into it, pressing his side into Jamie’s chest, much the same way Breana is leaning against Matt. Alex nods and glances up at Jamie before he smiles at Matt. “The view’s different,” he declares. “But time, it seems, has tempered it favorably.”

Matt blinks at Alex for a moment, and then shakes his head, steering Breana past he and Jamie. “Fifteen bloody years an’ you still joost can’t say anyfin’ ordinary, can you?” he chuckles.

Alex smiles and looks back up at Jamie. “Nuffin’ ordinary about it, Matthew.”


End file.
